So much surrounding Elwood's actual birth is blurry. After 24 hours in the hospital and 19 in labor, I was exhausted. When my doctor came in the check me and I still hadn't progressed beyond 6.5 cm, he called it.
Quickly, I was prepped for a c-section. The combination of drugs and nerves had given me the shakes and made me nauseous. I had lost all track of time. I knew my husband was scrubbing up, but it felt like forever until he was next to me in the operating room. The nurses and anesthesiologist were amazing, but I had never had surgery before and I was about to have my first child, so there was no calming me.
The started the procedure and explained what was happening. All I could do was cry and try desperately to focus on my husband. I had been warned that with a c-section, the baby may not cry immediately. But cry he did - loud and clear. Elwood had been perfectly happy where he was and now he was pissed off.
As they held up my 8 lb. 12 oz. first born so that I could see him over the drape, a small drop of blood fell onto the cloth. They wrapped him up and brought him to me so I could see and kiss him and than he and Todd were gone.
After that, I kept my eyes trained on that drop of blood. I willed my eyes to focus on it. Everything was surreal and fuzzy, but there, there was my proof - proof of the life I had just brought into this world.
I regret that my recollection of Elwood's birth and the first hours of his life are a hazy jumble in my mind. But I will always remember seeing him for the first time and focusing on that drop of blood that proved that he wasn't a dream.
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